Work-life balance is a big myth. No one can have it. Yeah, I know what you are thinking. But even pornstars have pretty lousy X-mas. They don't work in holidays and have no families to enjoy time-off with (I hope so!).
You are happy when life sucks much less than work does. Vacation is the break even threshold point where the work becomes so pathetic that you try to balance it by adding stress to your other life too. I have never seen a stress free vacation.
The key to survive is to see job stress as a yellow card. Then, just be hormonal hunk and beat the shit out of the referee.
If your life sucks more than your job, you are overpaid. Or, your parents are looking for a babysitter for the evening. They want to go to a movie.
Most "Gurus" are bearded because females don't want to be reminded of their ex or ex-ex types. You see how females immediately start "who does he look like" with everyone? Unless it is a carrot or bicycle. However they do it with baby carrots, if you care. When they see beard, they don't compare the face anymore. It's like "if someone does not have time to shave, one must be REALLY busy".
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Bobby - Death of a politician
What is is about
"It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune."
- Woody Allen
Guess what? This is not your 10-th grade essay to start with and elaborate on a quotation and Woody Allen is not always right - at least for death in movies.
Robert F Kennedy was fatally shot at Ambassador Hotel, Los Angeles on June 5, 1968 following a win in California Primary. I rented "Bobby" today thinking it will probably be a taut political thriller or an overly drawn anti-conspiracy drama like Oliver Stone's JFK. I was wrong too!
In fact, there is not even an actor playing "Bobby". Most of the footages are taken from CBS archive. "Bobby" is all about how America was fighting less in Vietnam and more within herself in the 60s. Racism, Dr King, Vietnam and a divided nation, huge part of the nation still dwelling with poverty, political sub-culture of satisfying media even at the cost of twisting polity, extreme hard work of just about everyone and - as always - immigrants. Written and directed by Emilio Estevez (elder son of Charlie Sheen, ex-brother in law of Denise Richards), "Bobby" shows a day in the lives of about twenty odd people who were in Ambassador Hotel on the day of the assassination. There is the elderly retired hotel employee (Anthony Hopkins) who - like all others in that period - was so much tuned to his job that he still keeps coming to the hotel. There is Sharon Stone (thankfully, she is finally looking of her age!) - a hair dresser in the hotel who exchanges middle-age marriage angst (bitches!) with star performer Demi Moore (who, thankfully, still is not looking even half her age!). Lindsay Lohan plays a teen who marries Elijah Wood in that hotel that same day so he can skip Vietnam! Like everywhere in US then, after assassination of Martin Luther King, there is racial tension among the hotel employees too. In other words, "Bobby" is a "Love Actually" in the backdrop of a real political event.
The movie briefly touches upon Bobby's political beliefs and kind of portrays him as the would have been savior of the nation. The movie is about two hours long. However, rather than depending on the 'conspiracy' angle of the murder or analyzing who did it and why - it spends most of the time with the period and characters that define it. There is also a "hippy" listening to Sitar and trying LSD to find "God". Overall, not a bad movie.
When should I watch
Depends. Do you enjoy political thrillers? Then keep yourself busy with the "Manchurian Candidate"s. Do you like period drama with identifiable events within it? Then watching it should not be a difficult experience.
Trivia
- Apparently, Estevez went almost broke producing this movie. He also developed a "writers' block" while writing. Martin Sheen advised him to take off to a remote place and keep trying. He checked in to a random motel and found the check-in lady there was apparently present in the Ambassador ballroom on the night it all happened. Lindsey Lohan's character was based on her! I usually doubt coincidences like this. Problem is, this type of claims are totally unverifiable. How could you possibly disprove the fact that once I talked with P Chidambaram on my Niagara trip? We both were on the same boat for the 'Maid of the Mist' tour of the falls and I introduced myself. He was accompanied by his wife. Well, nobody shot him that day and I am not famous.
- Though five more people had been shot with Bobby that night in reality, no one else died. In the movie, the other people shot are fictional -- probably because Estevez wanted to save some money by not having to give any fees to the actual people who were shot.
- We could make so many taut assassination movies in India. So many of them, right? Indira, Sanjay, Rajiv, Lalbahadur Shastri, Gandhi himself. Out of all these, I think Sanjay Gandhi's would make an excellent movie. However, to me the most planned, dramatic and till date unsolved (read - best movie potential) political murder is Lalit Narayan Mishra's. Lalit was Jagannath Mishra's elder brother. He was the then right-hand man of Indira Gandhi, the union railway minister from Bihar.
Side joke - Q. What's the similarity between Eminem and Ghani Khan Chowdhury?
A. Eminem is a white rapper, Ghani was a railway minister from outside Bihar.
Mishra was included in the all powerful CWC (Congress Working Committee) a few days before he was killed by a grenade explosion in an inauguration ceremony. There are still so many questions that need answering. For example, his wounded body was taken to Danapur, and not to much closer Darbhanga. Apparently, the train was also made to stop at several places so that an alive Mishra does not make it to hospital. Bihar, murky politics, assassination, train -- I cannot find a better movie plot!
I remember reading a few "India Today" pieces on Mishra's assassination. Cannot find any online. But here is the next best - an excellent article from Jan 13, 1975 issue of Time on "Murder in Bihar".
Sunday, April 8, 2007
Grindhouse - An Instant Classic
What it is about
Having just watched Grindhouse, as I was walking alone - my wife decided to stay home and watch "Look Who's Talking 3" instead - into the dark and desolate movie parking lot around 3AM - I almost felt vindicated. Since I can remember, people have tried to "talk me out" of my quite "diverse" movie watching (and reading) habits. As someone who feels equally comfortable watching Ray and Porn; or Truffaut (same date of birth as mine!) and David Dhawan, and having the honesty to accept to like the David Dhawan more - at times, I have constantly been flagged by my friends and acquaintances. It was almost a cardinal sin to come out of the "closet" in early 90s and declare that you truly like to watch those cheaply-made Tarzan movies in Hindi; those murders happening in the backdrop of mandatory Jai Santoshi Ma songs; Shetty's innocently portrayal of villain; Madan Puri's over the top crookedness; Biswajeet driving a speedboat to save his life - and his wig from flying out; white shoes with pink socks; cheap disco beats made cheaper by Bappida; the quintessential Bombay Mill movies (not only "Nimak Haram", but "Resham Ki Dori" too!); Hope 86 and Sonam; the zillions of almost copy of "Sholay", and almost copy of "Mazdoor" too. Someone said imitation is the biggest form of flattery. Nothing could underline the saying more than the fact that you can have about five and half plots and about 900 movies made around it in India per year.
Remember the 70s in Bollywood? Remember any of the movies out of - "Bond 303"(Parveen Babi-Jeetendra-Helen), "Suraksha" (Mithun) , "Nagin"(with everyone who was alive then), "Jaani Dushman" (Sanjeev Kumar)? In that same period, a movement of B-grade "exploitation films" (exploit the animals, sex, females, lesbian vampires, nazi nymphomaniac prison warden etc) were running the pop sub-layer of Euro-American films. Remember "Cannibal Holocaust" or "I spit on your graves"? Movies that came in at least 5 years late to India and caused a lot of that last bench whispers among people like us? In US, those movies were shown, often back to back or in a series of 3 to 4 together in a night, in slightly seedy, cheap downtown movie theaters called "Grindhouse". Try to imagine "Society" in Central Calcutta in early 90s if you want to have an idea of a real grindhouse!
Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez grew up on a spew of grindhouse movies. Most of QT's work is nothing but a solid grindhouse movie packed with much better dialogue, superb acting, state of the art action sequences and a unique rubber stamp of his direction on all frames that screams "guy movie with class". In fact, his Kill Bill is almost a straight liftoff from a grindhouse film "Five Deadly Venoms". RR - who started his career with so-called "burrito westerns" - moved from one genre to another (action, horror, humor, sci-fi) in his short but interesting career. To prime for Grindhouse, I watched two RR movies yesterday noon in DVD. One made with $7000 in 1992. The sequel made with $70 million in 1995. I would not have known that just by watching "El Mariachi" and "Desperado"!
Grindhouse is basically two movies back to back with some "fake" grindhouse type trailers (about four of it) and even some fake ads thrown in between. The first movie - "Planet Terror" - is directed by Rodriguez. Because of some military experiment gone wrong, a whole bunch of people turned into flesh eating zombies. Main characters - a hot blonde lesbian mother of a six-year old; a standup comedian wannabe go-go dancer who loses her leg but then was fitted with a machine gun to fight zombies; scantily clad teenage babysitter twin sisters; a leather jacket wearing dude called "El Wray" with attitude who 'never misses' a shot and will invariably show some tricks whenever he holds a gun - even if he only has a split second to shot and save himself. Oh! There's also our own Naveen Andrews as the madcap scientist who cuts and collects - in a glass bottle - balls of people who defy him. You get the idea. Don't you? Intentional grainy footage, go-go dancer with a shade of tears as she's stripping, lots of bike action, forced bad acting, a kid who seems too smart but is so stupid, mimicking and / or respecting the traditional grindhouse "too filmy moments" and a very strong almost surreal brand of humor just as much as the gore are the footprints(pun intended) of the movie.
Then comes some gory but totally funny and incredibly cool trailers. Watch the trailers to get re-charged because things will be a bit slower afterwards. The second movie - "Death Proof" - is directed by QT and the first half of it lacks much dynamics in an obvious intention to bore you a bit with "safety instructions" before a bad turbulence hits the plane. You may even get bored and start drooping to hear all the talks between the four 'usual' girls in bar. Then they meet "Stuntman Mike" who takes the pulse and his car racing to three digits within a few seconds. He has a totally cool 1971 Chevy Nova that he uses to kill people - specially uber-talkative chicks with attitude! The last part of Death Proof has QT stamped over it as some tough leather clad females literally kick male ass, especially that of guys who hate and abuse them. Together both movies, with trailers, run for about 3 hours 10 minutes. I did not even peek at my watch except for the window when women were randomly talking about guys, drinks, jobs, pick up lines etc in the bar. But then it was QT's idea of creating an intentional vacuum before filling it up with hot high pressure hurricane!
When should I watch it
Right now! Please watch it in the theater and ensure more such movies are made!!
If you are outside US, both the movies would probably not be packaged together as "Grindhouse". Probably they would be released separately as two different movies. That would be totally defeating the whole idea of movie made from movies. Standing alone, or even together, the movies are not even a 5/10. Unless you watch it together with the same perspective the directors want you to, and it's not very difficult to do here, you would probably yawn in the theater and think where you parked the car. If you follow the directors, you will smirk, smile, laugh, applaud and feel satiated at the end. Yet, you will feel hungry within moments after ending to grab more of it!
To me, movies are of four types, generally.
- Movies made from books
- Movies made from reality
- Movies made from surreal stuff. Movies to "feel", not "understand"
- Movies made from other movies.
Like they take old stuff and repackage it in today's format and call it "remix" in Bollywood and everywhere else -- I wish they could take today's stuff and repackage it in yesteryear's format. We may call it "Premix". There was a remix song a few years back that tried to do the same with the hero sporting a Rishi Kapoor in 70s style of hairstyle, wearing white bell bottoms and colorful oversize sweaters, playing his guitar while dancing on a stage that looks like a giant rotating LP record, riding a Rajdoot with his won-over girlfriend in white and both smiling at us next to the "The Beginning" message shown at the end! It was a deja vu all over again.
In the bollywood context, I am so tired of watching movie after movie made in the same high-gloss, shot in Manhattan, without any obvious stupid moment -- I badly miss those lackadaisical 70's and 80's movie where a villain had to be bald and had to make a lot of mean faces to express his badness. I badly miss the usual 12 minutes of "dhishum dhusum" at the end of the movie - typically near a naked Pune hill. I badly miss the Ranjeets trying to smuggle 1 crore of Diamonds (so cute! Ain't it?) using a Ranjeeta without a trace of accent in her English. I sorely miss the 6 minute song picturization with no more than 2 changes of clothes and no more than 3 long takes. I sorely miss Dal Lake and a certain Saira Banu with her bouffant who even feels cheated in love there just because his lover did not show up in her birthday party back in Bombay! This is in despite the fact that she hasn't even been pecked once by the local Kashmiri houseboat hunk! Will someone make a Grindhouse for me in India, please?
Trivia
This movie is so full of trivia that it needs a book, not the postscript of a lame blog to talk about it! Still I liked when they laughed about "Angelina Jolie's Gone in 60 seconds" and talked about the "real" 1974 one. That was one more Nirvana moment for me.
P.S.
Thanks to Quentin and Rodriguez. Really. Also thank you so MUCH to my dear wife. I love you! I know how difficult it is for you to even try to understand why I almost toss and turn whole night- and run to pee umpteenth time - before release of certain movies even though it does not have Hrithik Roshan or has a "bride" or "princess" word in the title. When I asked if you wanted to watch this movie, and you did not want -- you just let me without saying "You could watch this without ME!!!" I would never understand how meaningful could a few roses be to you on certain evenings, but I guess it's pretty much how I felt last night after "Grindhouse". Thank you again! Thank you for not making me feel like this guy!
Thursday, April 5, 2007
Part 2 - Ian and Greg
(Continuation of "Reading between the lines - Ian in defence of Greg" post that adds up the missing pieces in Ian's article. Bold pieces appeared directly on the article, the non-bold font adds the missing links.)
7/ For example, in Sachin Tendulkar's recent comments he said: "No coach had mentioned even in passing that my attitude was not correct."
As a cricketer Greg was always trying to better himself, especially his mental approach to the game. Improvement doesn't come without constantly challenging yourself and also responding to the demands of your team-mates, something that happened regularly in the Australian team. Having seen Tendulkar struggle in recent times Greg would accept it as part of his job to challenge the him to resurrect his batting in order to help India win matches.
You need different approaches to face a Koala and a Royal Bengal Tiger. You don't need a mosquito net if you live near Sydney Harbor, but would certainly need one in most parts of Kanpur. I understand what works in Australia may not work in India. OK, both our countries drive on the wrong side of the road, but that, and the 220v voltage in residential lines - are probably the only similarities you can find between the two. I understand the words or action that could challenge Ricky Ponting to come out of his shell and win back the ashes, could only frustrate and corner son of one Ramesh Tendulkar from Shivaji Park. This gentleman Mukul Kesavan rightly points out that - "it's odd that Indian journalists and commentators should find the stereotype of the straight-talking Australian and the truth-denying Indian easier to credit than the chorus of allegations that Chappell's preferred mode for communicating with the media was the modern equivalent of harem whispers".
I am so thankful India does not have it's share of Tupacs. Otherwise there could be a song on my brother sounding like "Shut up and let go. You hormonal biatch".
8/ That is not questioning a player's attitude, that is called striving for improvement.
Or, you can call it "break the bastard completely". It's also called"reverse psychology" and goes like this -
(a) Make a list of players you don't like as soon as you take control of the team.
(b) Wait till they are temporarily out of form.
(c) When they come to you seeking strength and encouragement in a Cricket crazy nation that has zero tolerance for failures, just break their nerve by pretending you are the only one in the world who is delivering the "harsh truth". Tell them they're done and over and should retire right now.
(d) When the player walks away confused, send middle-school girl types hushy-mushy SMS or email to some eager middle-aged journalists who will always pick out the lowest hanging fruits. Leak, leak and leak every little diaper details to the media. This breaks the player even more.
9/ Greg was one of the best half a dozen all-round fieldsmen I've seen; he's up there with Neil Harvey, Viv Richards, Mark Waugh, Mohammad Azharuddin and Ricky Ponting and it would have grated that many of India's best batsmen were slouches in the field.
I don't like giving statistics to establish a fact. We Australians really hate statistics when it does not serve us right. For example, we got miffed recently hearing South Africa, not us, are the topmost cricketing nation! But if I had to share some statistics on brother Greg's fielding -
ODI - 23 catches in 74 matches. 31.08%
Let's look at one player my brother really hated for his awful fielding - Sourav Ganguly -
ODI - 98 catches in 289 matches. 33.91%.
One of those 98 catches looked like this. Let's not even go to Sachin's fielding abilities and his strong reliable arms from long. Another player my brother hates (actually, envies) for fielding once caught this impossible one!
10/ To see senior players just going through the motions in the field would have been enough to send Greg off on a search for young players who could field. However, they would also have needed to be good at another skill and hence his early push to get younger, more athletic cricketers into the team.
After writing this I kept thinking if getting younger, more athletic cricketers is the panacea why my own country has a 37 year old as the main strike bowler? Why the main performing batsman in the world cup in my team is older than any of Sachin, Rahul, and of course, Yuvaraj! Why except South Africa, all other teams in Super 6 relies on someone over 32 to sail them over? Why Murali (35) and Jayasuriya (37) for Sri Lanka; Brian Lara (38) for West Indies; Kallis (32) and Shaun Pollock (34) have not listened to my brother's advice and started looking for another job? Why the performance of 30 plus players in this world cup beats the younger players' performance (exception - G Smith) by such huge margin? We have to talk it over between us brothers. I myself admitted Lara and Sachin are batsmen of same caliber; I never claimed Lara is so much more agile a fielder than Sachin -- then why did I advise (unasked, like us Chappells do) Sachin to look into a mirror and ask certain retirement questions?
What if someday people demand that they want younger commentators -and not some old farts who have never even played 20-20s - and then 60 year olds like us have no future in this lucrative part of the business? Would that be a harsh truth, an inconvenient message or some baseless conspiracy to promote certain men as commentators?
11/ The fact that his tenure as Indian coach was less than satisfactory for both Greg and the team is probably a good indication that the system producing young cricketers needs more than just a bit of fine tuning. The day before he resigned, a "Kerry Packer"-style proposal was put forward for Indian cricket, which suggests Greg isn't the only one who thinks the system needs a large overhaul.
I wrote this article in supporting my brother. So I had skipped two very inconvenient truths.
(a) Greg's failure as coach with India is nothing new for him or not just specific to India because of "certain Indian reasons". After his retirement, Greg coached South Australia team for five years with a very pedestrian record just like he had with India's. Guess what? He was not popular among players in South Australia team either (search for "Chappell draws criticism in Australia")
(b) If the system producing young cricketers needs "more than just a bit of fine tuning" -- why did not my brother mention it during his famous job-winning presentation "Chappellway" - the fast-track to World Cup 2007 ? Why the "Vision 2007" was all about how Greg will fine-tune Sehwag and win us the cup?
One thing I must say about our family though. We sometimes acknowledge our mistakes. Even though it took more than twenty years from the infamous underarm incident, Greg almost offered a half of an apology."If I had my time again, I wouldn't do it,"I am not saying Greg will, or shall, but it's just that we may have to wait a long, long time for a Chappell to admit a mistake.
We live on hope. Maybe someday he will accept- not just through a SMS or email reeking of rotten flesh -that he should just have kept quiet, should have given a little more time in the nets, encouraged the players and not made them feel insecure. That he just failed to enact, with team India, what he said coaching is all about - "We're not talking about rocket science - it's a simple game and I want to keep things simple."
7/ For example, in Sachin Tendulkar's recent comments he said: "No coach had mentioned even in passing that my attitude was not correct."
As a cricketer Greg was always trying to better himself, especially his mental approach to the game. Improvement doesn't come without constantly challenging yourself and also responding to the demands of your team-mates, something that happened regularly in the Australian team. Having seen Tendulkar struggle in recent times Greg would accept it as part of his job to challenge the him to resurrect his batting in order to help India win matches.
You need different approaches to face a Koala and a Royal Bengal Tiger. You don't need a mosquito net if you live near Sydney Harbor, but would certainly need one in most parts of Kanpur. I understand what works in Australia may not work in India. OK, both our countries drive on the wrong side of the road, but that, and the 220v voltage in residential lines - are probably the only similarities you can find between the two. I understand the words or action that could challenge Ricky Ponting to come out of his shell and win back the ashes, could only frustrate and corner son of one Ramesh Tendulkar from Shivaji Park. This gentleman Mukul Kesavan rightly points out that - "it's odd that Indian journalists and commentators should find the stereotype of the straight-talking Australian and the truth-denying Indian easier to credit than the chorus of allegations that Chappell's preferred mode for communicating with the media was the modern equivalent of harem whispers".
I am so thankful India does not have it's share of Tupacs. Otherwise there could be a song on my brother sounding like "Shut up and let go. You hormonal biatch".
8/ That is not questioning a player's attitude, that is called striving for improvement.
Or, you can call it "break the bastard completely". It's also called"reverse psychology" and goes like this -
(a) Make a list of players you don't like as soon as you take control of the team.
(b) Wait till they are temporarily out of form.
(c) When they come to you seeking strength and encouragement in a Cricket crazy nation that has zero tolerance for failures, just break their nerve by pretending you are the only one in the world who is delivering the "harsh truth". Tell them they're done and over and should retire right now.
(d) When the player walks away confused, send middle-school girl types hushy-mushy SMS or email to some eager middle-aged journalists who will always pick out the lowest hanging fruits. Leak, leak and leak every little diaper details to the media. This breaks the player even more.
9/ Greg was one of the best half a dozen all-round fieldsmen I've seen; he's up there with Neil Harvey, Viv Richards, Mark Waugh, Mohammad Azharuddin and Ricky Ponting and it would have grated that many of India's best batsmen were slouches in the field.
I don't like giving statistics to establish a fact. We Australians really hate statistics when it does not serve us right. For example, we got miffed recently hearing South Africa, not us, are the topmost cricketing nation! But if I had to share some statistics on brother Greg's fielding -
ODI - 23 catches in 74 matches. 31.08%
Let's look at one player my brother really hated for his awful fielding - Sourav Ganguly -
ODI - 98 catches in 289 matches. 33.91%.
One of those 98 catches looked like this. Let's not even go to Sachin's fielding abilities and his strong reliable arms from long. Another player my brother hates (actually, envies) for fielding once caught this impossible one!
10/ To see senior players just going through the motions in the field would have been enough to send Greg off on a search for young players who could field. However, they would also have needed to be good at another skill and hence his early push to get younger, more athletic cricketers into the team.
After writing this I kept thinking if getting younger, more athletic cricketers is the panacea why my own country has a 37 year old as the main strike bowler? Why the main performing batsman in the world cup in my team is older than any of Sachin, Rahul, and of course, Yuvaraj! Why except South Africa, all other teams in Super 6 relies on someone over 32 to sail them over? Why Murali (35) and Jayasuriya (37) for Sri Lanka; Brian Lara (38) for West Indies; Kallis (32) and Shaun Pollock (34) have not listened to my brother's advice and started looking for another job? Why the performance of 30 plus players in this world cup beats the younger players' performance (exception - G Smith) by such huge margin? We have to talk it over between us brothers. I myself admitted Lara and Sachin are batsmen of same caliber; I never claimed Lara is so much more agile a fielder than Sachin -- then why did I advise (unasked, like us Chappells do) Sachin to look into a mirror and ask certain retirement questions?
What if someday people demand that they want younger commentators -and not some old farts who have never even played 20-20s - and then 60 year olds like us have no future in this lucrative part of the business? Would that be a harsh truth, an inconvenient message or some baseless conspiracy to promote certain men as commentators?
11/ The fact that his tenure as Indian coach was less than satisfactory for both Greg and the team is probably a good indication that the system producing young cricketers needs more than just a bit of fine tuning. The day before he resigned, a "Kerry Packer"-style proposal was put forward for Indian cricket, which suggests Greg isn't the only one who thinks the system needs a large overhaul.
I wrote this article in supporting my brother. So I had skipped two very inconvenient truths.
(a) Greg's failure as coach with India is nothing new for him or not just specific to India because of "certain Indian reasons". After his retirement, Greg coached South Australia team for five years with a very pedestrian record just like he had with India's. Guess what? He was not popular among players in South Australia team either (search for "Chappell draws criticism in Australia")
(b) If the system producing young cricketers needs "more than just a bit of fine tuning" -- why did not my brother mention it during his famous job-winning presentation "Chappellway" - the fast-track to World Cup 2007 ? Why the "Vision 2007" was all about how Greg will fine-tune Sehwag and win us the cup?
One thing I must say about our family though. We sometimes acknowledge our mistakes. Even though it took more than twenty years from the infamous underarm incident, Greg almost offered a half of an apology."If I had my time again, I wouldn't do it,"I am not saying Greg will, or shall, but it's just that we may have to wait a long, long time for a Chappell to admit a mistake.
We live on hope. Maybe someday he will accept- not just through a SMS or email reeking of rotten flesh -that he should just have kept quiet, should have given a little more time in the nets, encouraged the players and not made them feel insecure. That he just failed to enact, with team India, what he said coaching is all about - "We're not talking about rocket science - it's a simple game and I want to keep things simple."
Reading between the lines - Ian Chappell in defence of his little brother
Ian Chappell, as usual, has come up in support of his little brother. I just felt the short article had a lot of missing things. Here they are. Ian's original comment in bold, followed by stuff he's missed to mention.
1/ If there was any chance of Greg Chappell continuing his tenure as coach of India it probably disappeared when Bob Woolmer was murdered during the World Cup.
It also disappeared as soon as Greg walked in to India with borderline pedophilic idea that "Anyone over 25 and Yuvaraj Singh are bad. Young people are good". It also disappeared when he started dishing out his ideas unasked and termed it a "leak". Some of his emails reached more people than a Nigerian scam spam would! One would be amazed with the zealousness one single person was attacked in those! It also disappeared when he showed middle-finger to a sensitive foreign crowd in a not-so-borderline racist example. It also disappeared as he sat glum in the dressing room with borderline depression and did not talk with anybody for over three days during the last world cup. It also disappeared when, in a nation that thrives on stability, he started breaking the working mold of a winning team by ransacking through batting order. And of bowling too. It also disappeared when he used a "bio-mechanist" to snoop around players he did not like and gave more credence to the stooge's reports than to the performance in the field. It also disappeared the day he went ahead and tried to fix not just the way Indians play cricket, but also the way world's largest democracy works. Oh, and it disappeared every day - and a lot of it were there - when the team coached by my brother Greg my-job-is-to-motivate Chappell - not only lost a game, but looked completely clueless and devoid of any spirit to fight.
Woolmar may have been lucky to survive had Pakistan won, but losing the job was inevitable for my brother even if India had won the cup this time. Let me be brutal, that we in Chappell family prefer to be even at the cost of truth, Greg was never flexible enough to hear others' opinion and thus never a good candidate as a coach of a team of eleven and to a billion supporters. If he were one who would listen to others, one certain newspaper would never have a heading like "Chappell, your underarm STINKS". (That was not I, Ian, BTW. I use deo.)
2/ Such an ugly incident is sure to focus your concentration on life's priorities.
Fear did bring him closer to the truth that a hundred failures could not! It sometimes happens that way. Ever tried to convince your kid to brush his teeth before bedtime? Logic often fails where fear works just fine.
3/ As much as it would seem that Greg is probably better off without all the angst that comes with one of the most demanding jobs in cricket I doubt he'll feel completely fulfilled.
How exactly different would you feel when you are sacked from a job that pays about $230,000 a year in Cash - mostly tax-free; let you live in a separate quarter of a fine five-star hotel; journalists gate crashing to hear you as if you are a rock star; and all you had to do to get that job was to prepare a better power-point presentation than other contenders (actually, the others mostly spoke!) and wear a suit in a sultry Delhi afternoon. You would definitely feel "not completely fulfilled" to let it go. The pain would be manifold if all you had to do to camouflage your failure by bitching about what a bunch of losers you have inherited. Discount the fact that the same bunch reached finals of World Cup last time.
4/ A perfectionist, even one who has mellowed, is never going to be happy with under-achieving on his expectations.
We can easily identify to one who's repeatedly been pointing at the huge amount of money involved in every sphere of the game.
- Sourav is not ready to quit captaincy because his finance is at stake.
- To Sachin - "You got more than you deserve". (In Bengali)
- About final 11 for a match - "Sponsors dictate who should be chosen and who should not."
5/ Greg's only rationale for playing cricket was to win. I can guarantee that, because we had the same tutor: our father Martin. Greg's approach in his latest role would have been exactly the same, to do everything he could to help India win.
That, exactly that, had become Greg's bane as coach. A coach wants to win too - but before winning little things like who should be in the team and who shouldn't for himself, a coach wants the TEAM to win. Greg wanted to clean up every 'mess' and then start playing. Ever waited for enough dishes to gather at the sink before you start washing them? It usually takes bad stink to drag you to start doing it as you keep piling it up! Greg thought of the players he did not like as "cancers" - not just people "I don't like, but have to work with anyways".
He wanted to start 11 battles and wanted to win all of it himself before he even starts winning 1 for the team. To him, it was a plain and simple world that we all have seen somewhere. It's called "I am right. You are grossly wrong" syndrome. Think of the classic ex-boss or the ex-wife and that's just a better looking Greg!
We inherited one more gene from our father Martin. The gene that carries the ability and desire to twist the truth to advance one's personal agenda. I did it too. Read about this bar fight between myself and Ian Botham -
Chappell then claims that Botham said he would "cut him from ear to ear". Botham vigorously denied that. "The day I have to resort to that," he wrote in his autobiography, "is the day I know there is something wrong."
After a few more words either Botham punched Chappell and sent him flying backwards off his chair into a crowd of Aussie Rules players scattering their drinks (Botham version) or he pushed him backwards off the chair and got hysterically angry (Chappell).
Chappell then fled the bar making a final rude comment at Botham as he left, resulting in Botham sprinting out of the bar and hurdling a car bonnet to get at him (Botham) or he calmly walked out of the bar pursued by a ranting Botham who had to be restrained by one of Chappell's team-mates (Chappell).
[Excerpted from Chappell and Botham autobiographies. You decide whom to trust, but close your eyes and visualize 6'2" Guy the Gorilla Vs. a skinny bloke bar-fight before you do. I do not see any "calmness" there in my vision!]
6/ Greg is a respectful person but there is no point in trying to be like an Indian when you've been employed because of your knowledge and experience as an Australian cricketer.
Please discount recent Sly Stallone episode where he was arrested for possession of a drug banned in Australia, but of very commonplace in USA as he was entering Australia to promote his "Rocky Balboa" - a movie that at least some Australians wanted to watch because of Sly's "knowledge and experience" as an American director! Or, the event where Hillary Swank was fined $163 for carrying an Apple to the garden of Eden called New Zealand. So what I am trying to say is - when you go and visit a different culture, be careful to their law and be respectful to them - especially to the difference between yours and theirs. Unless of course you hail from Chappell family. In that case, do not care about those dark-skinned bastards. Remember we have a common tutor? Greg and I? Our father Martin.
So, if you are one of us, if you're from Chappell family - just show your middle finger to the rest of the world. They DON'T matter! Be a Chappell first, and then be an Australian. Someone tried that before with some success too. Someone wanted to be Hitler first and then a German. Being a human does not ever show up in the wish list of people like us.
Part 2
The Good Shepherd
What it is about
I always thought action, horror and thrillers are solely my kind of genre in my family. So I got (pleasantly) surprised when my wife - even before the DVD release - told me how much she wanted to see this. Later, I understood this movie maps to her ex-institution (school) that was named the same. Thankfully, she was not talking of CIA. Actually, even if she had, I would not know of it!
That's all this movie is about -- secrets and the fine balance between sharing and keeping it. When a piece of information becomes useful for a good cause it becomes knowledge. But when another piece has some destructive potential it becomes a secret. Like the surprise birthday present for your spouse that you guard with all your power for several days only to reveal it at the right time - secrets are closeted and strongly guarded waiting for its time to come. A secret that is never revealed is probably only a shameful trivia, not exactly a secret.
Imagine the first secret of your life. Whatever it is, it probably had caused you pain, anguish, conflict and a certain other seemingly avoidable feelings. Or, if you are like Edward Bell Wilson (Matt Damon) in this movie, that very secret might become the spinning wheel of your life events. The greatness of secret is not in keeping it wrapped -- that's the easiest part; the absolute art is in the process of revealing it - where and when. Good Shepherd, directed by De'Nero, does an almost poetic yet ruthless job in showing one such cycle.
Probably because I was born in a state in India run by democratically elected communists (that's my favorite example of "oxymoron"), my first introduction to CIA was during a then popular play. Through a song that went like -
"Bon theke berulo tiya-
Ranga Topor MathaY diya.
Keno keno keno?
Sob jante parbi cia r kache.
Cia cia cia"
(CIA pronounced as in Shia. To rhyme with "Tiya").
Translated, it means -
"The parrot with a headgear bright.
Came out of forest right.
Why How Where?
Ask CIA. Ask CIA. Ask CIA.
That's why they are there!"
I was a preteen and this song made me extremely fond of this thing called "Shia". This feeling was later supplemented by the local leftist media that would print the allegations blaming CIA for a school bus accident in Vietnam or, for a wild bush fire in Congo. No one even talked about who organized the state leaders' killings. It was all so obvious. Arafat must have known about it before, but CIA sent people to do the task. That was what our parents and we all agreed upon at that time.
When watching GS, I remembered a quote from a movie I recently watched (Shooter) and smirked to myself thinking of the line spoken by a FBI agent -
"Come on. We cannot be THAT smart. Otherwise we would not work for the Federal government."
Times changed. There is no more organized, methodical cold war in the world anymore. Our biggest threats now come from a herd of hard-to-trace, independent terrorist "cells". How relevant is a mammoth organization to tackle the latest range of threat is another question, but it surely was relevant during the time span of this movie.
Edward starts his conscious decision making by keeping his father's suicide note a secret, even from himself. He gets drawn, almost by fate, to the dark and darker alleys of secrets and gets employed during the chilly second world war days in charge of "counter intelligence". Counter intelligence is not so much about letting no secrets out to the enemy. That's impossible. Their goal is to keep the secrets buried, and never come out within the enemy so it becomes virtually useless. Edward's family life suffers. If it were today, I would have used a stronger word than "suffered". I just had to when the husband spent five years away from his newly married wife, working out the secrets and breaking it. In the end, just like it did in the beginning, Edward's biggest secret comes around to haunt him and his family.
This is neither your Grand-mother's spy thriller (Le Carre, anyone?), nor it is the Vodka Martini spy action like James Bond. Good Shepherd is more like a real life documentary, clearly traversing through characters that existed and events that happened at regular intervals. You could never shake a death off saying "oh yeah! that chase was cool". You could never - facing an intelligence failure - brush it away as "too stupid". You yourself could not have done better there in reality. I gathered this movie was based on the real life character of the guy who headed the counter intelligence in the early CIA. I hope so. Because if it were not, I would never ever again believe that reality is far more intriguing than fiction. Always.
Angelina Jolie was superb in portraying a wife who marries a wrong man at the turn of a wrong moment of passion, but lingers on. De Nero appears in a cameo and offers some diversion from the unidimensional tension that was building up. Joe Pesci was hilarious in the very short role of an Italian mafia-owning-legit-business.
When to watch it
Don't - unless you enjoyed the first time you spilled the beans on someone! Was that a moment that brings that smart-ass smile on your lip right now? Then rush to watch it right NOW!
The pace may be a bit too slow for usual spy thriller fans, but you have to realize that real life James Bonds just don't wake up next to a hottie - who can die for him and does - and then go on killing a whole bunch of people during the day wearing a tux.
Good Shepherd - just like the recent "Zodiac", "Hollywoodland", "Black Dahlia"- points to the latest Hollywood obsession with reality and the dark secrets that may lie underneath.
Monday, April 2, 2007
Eight movies this weekend
Watched eight movies this weekend.
(1) Turistas
What is it about?
A bunch of American teenagers, backpacking in Brazil, gets stranded. They fall under the trap of a vicious Doctor who kills tourists and then sells off their organs to rich westerners who flock to the country because the wait for transplants is much less there than in USA.
I noticed a "Scarier than Hostel" blurb on the DVD jacket and picked this up for my Friday evening before dinner watch. The movie started fine, but lost the track exactly where the suspense was about to be built up. The doctor was not evil enough, the 'traps' were flimsy, underwater photography was too dark.
When should I see?
Exactly when I watched it. After a long week, on Friday evening when you are too tired to go - have a couple of beer with Wasabi peas, recline and let the torture begin. It will wear you good enough for the dinner. Go for it if you like exploitation movies or just teenage horror / thrillers. I do.
Trivia -
What is it about?
An above average thriller. A FBI agent's (Dennis Quaid) 2 year old son gets kidnapped by a serial killer. The killer leaves a lot of cryptic clues for Quaid. Quaid sets off in the trail and finally nabs him, but only after some usual plot twists.
This is probably Danny Glover's best work till date. His glances were especially spine chilling. Speeding scene in Colorado Rockies in an old Ford was very tight and probably would be one reason I could possibly see this movie again after a few years. Quaid was very determined and reminded me of his role (later) in Alamo. R Lee Arney (he was Leatherface's adopted dad in the latest Texas Chainsaw Massacre) was simply splendid as the Texan Sheriff.
When should I watch?
Don't spend money to rent it right now, especially if you're paying high mortgage. But do watch it if it's ever shown in cable. If nothing there are so many great actors in it and I bet you are a fan of one or more of them!
Trivia
What it is about?
Bad, bad storyline. A PYD (Pretty young dentist, Julia Ormund) does part-time in a Jail where she meets and falls in love with a convict accused of killing his wife (Tim Roth). She gets embroiled in some low-grade conspiracy by IRA. Stupid movie.
When Should I watch it
Don't! Unless 'prison romance' is your cup of tea. Honestly, I watched Julia Ormund's "Barber of Siberia" in a lonely Saturday evening in Edinburgh years back and became a fan. She hasn't done many movies, so when I saw this one in the DVD shop I could not resist.
Trivia
What it is about
Watching French action thrillers are like watching a leopard who is also a poet. It has unique European slickness coupled with Hollywood wham-bam moments. Jean Reno plays Commissioner Niemens ("Who do you think you are, living legend?") who tries to solve a series of gruesome murders in the oldest European University. Watch out for some great shots of French Alps.
When should I watch it
Anytime - if you are either a French movie fan OR an avid action movie watcher.
Trivia
What is it about
A World War II movie. Colonel McNamara (Bruce Willis), imprisoned in a German POW camp with thousands of American soldiers, leads charge to free his soldiers. Hart (Colin Farrell), a senator's son, tries to redeem himself after he sold information cheaply to German when caught.
There is a wonderful cinematic parallel between the racism in Nazi Germany and racism in US armed forces. Tremendous race politics between White and Black American soldiers during
the war has been extremely well documented while documenting a different track.
When should I watch it
Chances are you are already tired of Bruce Willis playing yet another "cop" type role. It's easy to be tired of him - he is not exactly a 'method actor' You watch five minutes of "Die Hard" followed by five minutes of "Lucky Number Slevin" and I bet you won't be able to differentiate.
But if you are not, by all means watch this. The portrayal of racial politics itself is a very good cause.
Trivia
What it is about
A nice romantic comedy by a young first-time female director. Six couples on their honeymoon trip start off for Goa in a bus. A couple of marriages turn sour within just a couple of days. Other marriages survive their own share of ups and downs, doubts and peaks, fun and gloom. Some compromise or change to stick to the relationship. Some don't. Some reveal deep and hidden secrets, others just hide it and go along with it. In the end, most inhibitions break and they start back for the 'middle order' batting.
Most of the actors are really fluid here, but I do want to give an honorable mention to Kay Kay Menon. He has already amazed me by his performance in "Black Friday", but I was waiting to see a comic role from him. After early movies of Amitabh Bachchan (Adalat, Mr Natwarlal) - I have not seen such good comic timing from anyone in Bollywood.
Menon played a somewhat withdrawn and conservative Bengali husband. His couple of scenes in the bus to pacify the crestfallen Gujju husband had me in splits for several minutes.
When should I watch it
If you have not already taken your spouse to the local Multiplex, rent this DVD to watch it after a hard day - either at work, or at home.
If you don't bother about the marital chemistry (or physics) -- Vishal-Sekhar's Sajnaji Vaari Vaari will surely amaze you.
Trivia
What it is about
Yawn, yawn! Some "21 grams" (heart transplanted patient looking for the donor); quote like "
I am ready to die in love. I am ready to kill in love, but I am not ready to be a fool in love"; Himesh; some (actually, a lot) Celina cleavage; Vikram Bhatt -- you get the idea?
Celina plays a widow with negative shades. OK, I just spoilt the suspense for you and saved you Rs 100. I know actors often say things like "the character I played is actually me" -- but I never expected Amrish Puri to say similar thing about his Mogambo role! Celina, however, did exactly say that about her character here -- "The character I play is MOST me". Can you be dumber than that? Apparently, Celina can!
She also thinks widows dress like this. She thinks "Red is the turning point in her career". Really? If that was a turning point, I would very like to see how a STOP sign would look in there!
If I were Celina's manager, I would advise her to apply here for a job after such a big turning point!
When should I watch it
You already heard / seen the "Afreeeeeeen Tera Chehra"? That's good enough. Just go and watch some more Celina interviews in every channel that's interested in her. Those will be more interesting, seriously, than the movie.
Trivia
(8) Shooter
What it is about
Mark Wahlberg as a can-do-all ex-marksman whom every single federal agency is looking for a charge to try to kill president. He, of course, finishes his job by killing everyone who wrongly involved him. He gets a totally hot southern chick - who looks and more, speaks like Jessica Simpson - after everything is over.
When should I watch it
Like me if you suddenly get a Monday off because you "worked too hard for last couple of months" (seriously! My boss on Friday asked me to take the day off on Monday) and you have not much to do in the nice spring afternoon go and buy a ticket.
Trivia
(1) Turistas
What is it about?
A bunch of American teenagers, backpacking in Brazil, gets stranded. They fall under the trap of a vicious Doctor who kills tourists and then sells off their organs to rich westerners who flock to the country because the wait for transplants is much less there than in USA.
I noticed a "Scarier than Hostel" blurb on the DVD jacket and picked this up for my Friday evening before dinner watch. The movie started fine, but lost the track exactly where the suspense was about to be built up. The doctor was not evil enough, the 'traps' were flimsy, underwater photography was too dark.
When should I see?
Exactly when I watched it. After a long week, on Friday evening when you are too tired to go - have a couple of beer with Wasabi peas, recline and let the torture begin. It will wear you good enough for the dinner. Go for it if you like exploitation movies or just teenage horror / thrillers. I do.
Trivia -
- Apparently a lot of Brazilians are pissed off thinking this movie may do a lot bad for their tourism. They even have started voting this down in IMDB (got only 2.x, deserves at least 5).
- First half an hour has pretty good amount of classy nudity. Watch out for ex GUESS jeans model Beau Garrett flaunting her near perfect body in blue Brazilian water.
- http://www.paradisebrazil.com/ is a fake promotional website. Pretty cool concept though!
What is it about?
An above average thriller. A FBI agent's (Dennis Quaid) 2 year old son gets kidnapped by a serial killer. The killer leaves a lot of cryptic clues for Quaid. Quaid sets off in the trail and finally nabs him, but only after some usual plot twists.
This is probably Danny Glover's best work till date. His glances were especially spine chilling. Speeding scene in Colorado Rockies in an old Ford was very tight and probably would be one reason I could possibly see this movie again after a few years. Quaid was very determined and reminded me of his role (later) in Alamo. R Lee Arney (he was Leatherface's adopted dad in the latest Texas Chainsaw Massacre) was simply splendid as the Texan Sheriff.
When should I watch?
Don't spend money to rent it right now, especially if you're paying high mortgage. But do watch it if it's ever shown in cable. If nothing there are so many great actors in it and I bet you are a fan of one or more of them!
Trivia
- I am a sucker for good old-fashioned train action sequences (like, Sholay) in movies and Switchback has a lot of it! Most of the Colorado scenes were shot in Pinecliffe. Sadly, the same location saw a pretty big train accident in 2004. You could identify some of the places in the pictures from the movie.
- Western Pacific Railroad trains were used.
What it is about?
Bad, bad storyline. A PYD (Pretty young dentist, Julia Ormund) does part-time in a Jail where she meets and falls in love with a convict accused of killing his wife (Tim Roth). She gets embroiled in some low-grade conspiracy by IRA. Stupid movie.
When Should I watch it
Don't! Unless 'prison romance' is your cup of tea. Honestly, I watched Julia Ormund's "Barber of Siberia" in a lonely Saturday evening in Edinburgh years back and became a fan. She hasn't done many movies, so when I saw this one in the DVD shop I could not resist.
Trivia
- Tim Roth has an unusual gait. I noticed this in "Rob Roy" too. He was really good in that movie. Apparently, it's a physical defect.
What it is aboutWatching French action thrillers are like watching a leopard who is also a poet. It has unique European slickness coupled with Hollywood wham-bam moments. Jean Reno plays Commissioner Niemens ("Who do you think you are, living legend?") who tries to solve a series of gruesome murders in the oldest European University. Watch out for some great shots of French Alps.
When should I watch it
Anytime - if you are either a French movie fan OR an avid action movie watcher.
Trivia
- Jean Reno has done some really quality UPS commercials.
What is it about
A World War II movie. Colonel McNamara (Bruce Willis), imprisoned in a German POW camp with thousands of American soldiers, leads charge to free his soldiers. Hart (Colin Farrell), a senator's son, tries to redeem himself after he sold information cheaply to German when caught.
There is a wonderful cinematic parallel between the racism in Nazi Germany and racism in US armed forces. Tremendous race politics between White and Black American soldiers during
the war has been extremely well documented while documenting a different track.
When should I watch it
Chances are you are already tired of Bruce Willis playing yet another "cop" type role. It's easy to be tired of him - he is not exactly a 'method actor' You watch five minutes of "Die Hard" followed by five minutes of "Lucky Number Slevin" and I bet you won't be able to differentiate.
But if you are not, by all means watch this. The portrayal of racial politics itself is a very good cause.
Trivia
- "Black Soldiers in America's Wars" is a super-excellent book on the racial politics in US armed forces.
What it is about
A nice romantic comedy by a young first-time female director. Six couples on their honeymoon trip start off for Goa in a bus. A couple of marriages turn sour within just a couple of days. Other marriages survive their own share of ups and downs, doubts and peaks, fun and gloom. Some compromise or change to stick to the relationship. Some don't. Some reveal deep and hidden secrets, others just hide it and go along with it. In the end, most inhibitions break and they start back for the 'middle order' batting.
Most of the actors are really fluid here, but I do want to give an honorable mention to Kay Kay Menon. He has already amazed me by his performance in "Black Friday", but I was waiting to see a comic role from him. After early movies of Amitabh Bachchan (Adalat, Mr Natwarlal) - I have not seen such good comic timing from anyone in Bollywood.
Menon played a somewhat withdrawn and conservative Bengali husband. His couple of scenes in the bus to pacify the crestfallen Gujju husband had me in splits for several minutes.
When should I watch it
If you have not already taken your spouse to the local Multiplex, rent this DVD to watch it after a hard day - either at work, or at home.
If you don't bother about the marital chemistry (or physics) -- Vishal-Sekhar's Sajnaji Vaari Vaari will surely amaze you.
Trivia
- If Dil Chahta Hai was college goer's Goa, Honeymoon is Goa for married folks. Honeymoon's director Reema Kagti was also an asst director in Dil Chahta Hai.
- Apparently, the director wanted a 'doormat' theme in the lyrics of "Sajnaji Bhari Bhari" (watch the DVD extra for this 'revealtion').
- Shabana Azmi's first on-screen kiss. Remember the peck she gave to Nelson Mandela and the controversy it created in early 90s?
- Kay Kay has done MBA from Pune University (OK, who's the other famous MBA actor in Bollywood?). People could have missed his tiny bit of role in "Naseem", but that's where he debuted.
What it is about
Yawn, yawn! Some "21 grams" (heart transplanted patient looking for the donor); quote like "
I am ready to die in love. I am ready to kill in love, but I am not ready to be a fool in love"; Himesh; some (actually, a lot) Celina cleavage; Vikram Bhatt -- you get the idea?
Celina plays a widow with negative shades. OK, I just spoilt the suspense for you and saved you Rs 100. I know actors often say things like "the character I played is actually me" -- but I never expected Amrish Puri to say similar thing about his Mogambo role! Celina, however, did exactly say that about her character here -- "The character I play is MOST me". Can you be dumber than that? Apparently, Celina can!
She also thinks widows dress like this. She thinks "Red is the turning point in her career". Really? If that was a turning point, I would very like to see how a STOP sign would look in there!
If I were Celina's manager, I would advise her to apply here for a job after such a big turning point!
When should I watch it
You already heard / seen the "Afreeeeeeen Tera Chehra"? That's good enough. Just go and watch some more Celina interviews in every channel that's interested in her. Those will be more interesting, seriously, than the movie.
Trivia
- Apparently, "after a few unsatisfactory takes" for the scene where Aftab kisses Celina -- she was "injured" in her lips. Who determines these things? I mean whether the shot was OK or NG? I hope it's not the hero (folks like Aftab, Imraan Haasmi). I would be very mad as a producer if that were the case!
- Celina has two puppies named "Budweiser" and "Heineken". I wonder if they always keep peeing! Bipasha's dog, BTW, is called "Posto".
(8) Shooter
What it is aboutMark Wahlberg as a can-do-all ex-marksman whom every single federal agency is looking for a charge to try to kill president. He, of course, finishes his job by killing everyone who wrongly involved him. He gets a totally hot southern chick - who looks and more, speaks like Jessica Simpson - after everything is over.
When should I watch it
Like me if you suddenly get a Monday off because you "worked too hard for last couple of months" (seriously! My boss on Friday asked me to take the day off on Monday) and you have not much to do in the nice spring afternoon go and buy a ticket.
Trivia
- Wahlberg is on a high after 2005 "Four Brothers" and last year's "Departed". Surprisingly, he is pro gun-control!
- He spent quite sometime behind bars when he was very young.s in my career
Sunday, April 1, 2007
Random Weekend Ramble - Stupid Spouse Killers etc.
(1) New article In CNNMoney -- "25 Rules to grow Rich By" - Last week, there were only 10 of them in an article in the same site! Can experts first agree at a number and then let me stop from having morning lattes now so that I could have morning lattes in my retirement? It's difficult for me when the numbers change every now and then.
Another article in the same site screams "You don't have to spend a lot of time to put your financial house in order". Well, if you don't have to spend a lot of time to fix it, it ain't broken that bad. Your problem probably is something like "I think I had an extra $5 bill in my wallet. Where did I spent it?!" I've never seen a guy spending fifteen minutes alone in a corner and come back up with "I am ready to retire now".
(2) How much more STUPID, IDIOTIC, IMBECILE could these "NRIs" possible be? One 32 year old Avtar Singh Grewal was arrested in New Delhi airport after he fled following his wife's killing in Phoenix, Arizona. Well, some people have done that. Yes. But read this -
"He claims that his wife kicked and slapped him and in a fit of anger he strangulated her. He als says that he felt sorry and left a note saying that he has killed his wife. "
Leaving a note!!??? For whom? If you left it for the Police, then wasn't it easier to explain it to them personally. Or, was it for the poor wife? Something like -
"Honey,
I am so sorry I'd killed you about seven minutes ago. But since they are too liberal for capital punishment in Arizona, let me try getting caught in Delhi. Join you soon!
Your's, today and forever -
Avtu"
The stupid saga does not stop here. This guy, after the killing, also tried to commit suicide. TWICE! "he claims to have tried to commit suicide by slashing his wrist and then trying to hang himself from the ceiling."
Come up with your entry for "My stupidest day" for me! Can you? Mine is this young, sprightly Sardar who managed to do it ALL in a 24 hour time-frame --
(1) Got kicked and slapped by his wife, apparently in public!
(2) He killed her.
(3) Feeling sorry, he left a note by her dead body.
(4) He tries to commit suicide by slashing his wrist. It probably doesn't work because Sardars don't necessarily carry good quality shaving blades or may be the kara was too hard to cut.
(5) So he tries to hang himself from the ceiling now. Fails!
(6) He takes a Continental flight to New Delhi. I don't think this dude travels business class. I would take a police lock-up over a transatlantic coach experience!
(7) Gets caught before he takes out his passport in the airport after landing. I doubt if the cops at Delhi airport went like "Hmmm, there are 72 young, single, scared looking Sardars in this plane. We really don't know who is the guy Interpol alerted us for!". It was easier than eating a chicken leg.
Now, thanks to this idiot bastard and because people invariably notice the articles like below, my wife will have some "interesting" phone calls (made to her side) to India over next few weeks! Sigh!
God I wish I were a member of the Indian Cricket Team now!
On the other hand, this husband is almost getting a hero's reception after he killed his wife! Short story shorter - wife was banging some 'lover'; husband comes home; says "honey"; wife starts screaming "Somebody SAVE ME. PLEASE! He's raping me...". Husband fires gun at the rapist / lover. He gets caught but jury charges the wife of manslaughter! I say somebody give her a CEO job. Never seen this much presence of mind in Corporate America even at the face of year long crisis, this woman just solved the biggest one a person can endure within probably 3 split seconds!
Another article in the same site screams "You don't have to spend a lot of time to put your financial house in order". Well, if you don't have to spend a lot of time to fix it, it ain't broken that bad. Your problem probably is something like "I think I had an extra $5 bill in my wallet. Where did I spent it?!" I've never seen a guy spending fifteen minutes alone in a corner and come back up with "I am ready to retire now".
(2) How much more STUPID, IDIOTIC, IMBECILE could these "NRIs" possible be? One 32 year old Avtar Singh Grewal was arrested in New Delhi airport after he fled following his wife's killing in Phoenix, Arizona. Well, some people have done that. Yes. But read this -
"He claims that his wife kicked and slapped him and in a fit of anger he strangulated her. He als says that he felt sorry and left a note saying that he has killed his wife. "
Leaving a note!!??? For whom? If you left it for the Police, then wasn't it easier to explain it to them personally. Or, was it for the poor wife? Something like -
"Honey,
I am so sorry I'd killed you about seven minutes ago. But since they are too liberal for capital punishment in Arizona, let me try getting caught in Delhi. Join you soon!
Your's, today and forever -
Avtu"
The stupid saga does not stop here. This guy, after the killing, also tried to commit suicide. TWICE! "he claims to have tried to commit suicide by slashing his wrist and then trying to hang himself from the ceiling."
Come up with your entry for "My stupidest day" for me! Can you? Mine is this young, sprightly Sardar who managed to do it ALL in a 24 hour time-frame --
(1) Got kicked and slapped by his wife, apparently in public!
(2) He killed her.
(3) Feeling sorry, he left a note by her dead body.
(4) He tries to commit suicide by slashing his wrist. It probably doesn't work because Sardars don't necessarily carry good quality shaving blades or may be the kara was too hard to cut.
(5) So he tries to hang himself from the ceiling now. Fails!
(6) He takes a Continental flight to New Delhi. I don't think this dude travels business class. I would take a police lock-up over a transatlantic coach experience!
(7) Gets caught before he takes out his passport in the airport after landing. I doubt if the cops at Delhi airport went like "Hmmm, there are 72 young, single, scared looking Sardars in this plane. We really don't know who is the guy Interpol alerted us for!". It was easier than eating a chicken leg.
Now, thanks to this idiot bastard and because people invariably notice the articles like below, my wife will have some "interesting" phone calls (made to her side) to India over next few weeks! Sigh!
Married-to-NRI stamp on passport Special Coverage: NRI Grooms (What are we? Charles Shobhraj?) Govt to help women left in lurch abroad
God I wish I were a member of the Indian Cricket Team now!
On the other hand, this husband is almost getting a hero's reception after he killed his wife! Short story shorter - wife was banging some 'lover'; husband comes home; says "honey"; wife starts screaming "Somebody SAVE ME. PLEASE! He's raping me...". Husband fires gun at the rapist / lover. He gets caught but jury charges the wife of manslaughter! I say somebody give her a CEO job. Never seen this much presence of mind in Corporate America even at the face of year long crisis, this woman just solved the biggest one a person can endure within probably 3 split seconds!
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